Employment, woo!

I started my new job yesterday as a (don’t laugh) dinner lady at my local school. It’s fun, the ladies I work with are friendly, and the kids are sweet. Well, they’ve been sweet the last couple of days, the ladies say that it’s because there’s a new face around and when they clue in to the fact I’m here for a while, they’ll start causing trouble again. Two of them have already cheerfully introduced themselves to me, which resulted in this fun exchange:

Boy: “Can you guess what my name is?”

Me: “Hmm… is it… Joe?”

Boy: *look of shock* How did you know?!

Me: Ahh, I have my methods. *winking at the lady who told me his name earlier*

(Changed the name because, it’s a kid, I don’t want to share their names online.)

You may think that based on my recent posts about being a terrible cook that being a dinner lady is an inappropriate fit for me, but last night I made a delicious dinner and didn’t burn anything or leave anything raw. Nobody died – that’s the mark of a good-enough cook in my opinion. “Nobody’s died here” should be the name of a restaurant. You can market it by adding the word (yet) in brackets on all the promotional material and give out leaflets in the door that say “Will you be the first?”

Working in a school, and in the kitchen none the less, has also meant acquiring a voice for big people and a voice for little people. I’m not much of a talker and my voice is not at all authoritative. I yell at kids to “walk, don’t run!” and the kids run faster. The only problem is, when talking in my little peoples voice it’s hard to switch off, so I end up talking to teachers in my little peoples voice and

Christmas joke of the day! You get two day since I missed yesterdays:

Q: How do witches tell the time?
A: With a witch-watch!

Q: Who delivers cats Christmas presents?
A: Santa Paws!

At least one of them were Christmas related…

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